Tomorrow morning I’m gonna hand the keys back over. My boyfriend has been a huge help. It’s amazing how much more strong and real I feel. I feel like I’m really a person that just happens to share a body with other people. I don’t feel like a supporting character or a backup dancer anymore. I feel like I matter.
Interpersonal contact feels so much more important to me than it did before. I feel like I more intuitively know that there’s a person on the other side and it’s been factoring into all of the communication I do. It’s made love feel so much more punchy.
I never really expected things as simple as breathing exercises to turn into anchors that chain me into the present moment. I like the feeling of meditation with the solidity of reality instead of the ephemerality of the mind. I like the texture of the air as I breathe it. I like the feeling of it all.
It’s interesting how much my primary form changing really changed my outlook on things. It feels like you could have an entire branch of philosophy around a person’s self-image and how it feeds into the self.
I’m Jessica, and I’m a person.